You Are a Good Mom

A few months ago I read this book called, "Hands Free Mama".  It spoke to me in a million different ways.  I could totally relate to the author's feelings of inadequacy.  I want to share with you one of my favorite parts of the book.  If you are a Mom, I think you can totally relate to this.  Perhaps it will help you to remind yourself of who you are. 


The story began with the author telling about a devastating tornado that ripped through their hometown.  It killed 316 people in their state 10 months before and everyone was on edge whenever bad weather went through.  It happened to be an evening where severe weather was predicted.  That evening, she and her husband discussed whether it would be okay to put their daughters to sleep upstairs, and because the severe weather had headed north of them, they decided to put their girls to bed.  So she tucked them in bed, watched them go to sleep, and then tiptoed down the stairs.  When she got to the bottom of the steps, she froze in her tracks.  She couldn't move her feet.  She looked out the window and the trees were swaying violently.  She whispered to herself, "I can't stay downstairs."  Rationally, she knew everything was okay, because she had checked the radar, but her brain wouldn't let her go there.  So she went back upstairs and laid down next to her sleeping child.


She imagined every life-saving scenario in the event that a tornado would come.  Even if it meant that she would be blown up into a tornado's vortex, she would never once let go of her children.  If they were going to die, she was going to die with them.


It was at this moment that a divine whisper of affirmation popped into her head:


You are a good mom.
And then a little louder.
You are a good mom.


She began to cry.  As her tears dripped down on her daughter's pillowcase, she knew why those words touched her so much.  Because she didn't say them enough.  Truth be told, she found herself saying the exact opposite. 


The gentle voice inside of her that said, "You are a good mom,"  had more words to offer her.


So you aren't perfect.  You make mistakes and even some poor choices.  Some days your patience is too thin... some days you allow negative thoughts to silence thoughts of gratitude...some days you aren't the mom you want to be.


But hear this, and remember it:
When your children need defending, you defend.
When your children need comfort, you comfort.
When your children hurt, you hurt too.
And the reason you lie here wide awake when you could be sleeping soundly in your own bed is because you are willing to die for them.


So stop berating yourself.
Stop questioning yourself.
Stop shaming yourself.
And for God's sake, stop criticizing yourself.
Stop wondering if you are enough,
Because you are.
The fact that you have vowed to take on any monster of nature or human form that threatens your children overshadows the daily mistakes you make as a parent.


It is time to let go of the guilt and live each passing day knowing the love you have for your children is a life-sustaining positive that surmounts all other negatives.